What “Snakes” Do You Need to Drive Out of Your Life?

Time to Refine
The Life Refinery Newsletter
March 2007

“Saint Patrick was a gentleman, who through strategy and stealth
Drove all the snakes from Ireland, here’s a drink to his health!
But not too many drinks, lest we lose ourselves and then
Forget the good Saint Patrick, and see them snakes again!”
~Author Unknown


With the last name of O’Brien, I feel it’s only fitting that I pay tribute to St. Patrick’s Day. This month’s quote is based on the famous legend of St. Patrick and how he drove the snakes from Ireland. A nice bit of folklore but what does this have to do with your life you ask? Well, a lot because it sparks a very important question: What “snakes” do you need to drive out of your life?

Now, since snakes weren’t native to Ireland, the ones in the Patrick legend were merely a metaphor. So what do your snakes represent?

There are many types of snakes, from the deadly to the benign. So whether it’s a boa constrictor that is squeezing the life out of you (a toxic or draining relationship perhaps), a cobra that is poised to strike (the procrastination that causes a last minute panic for example) or an “ankle biter” that is simply annoying you (such as the clutter that is piling up around your house), your snakes are impacting your life in negative ways.

How much more idyllic would your life be if your snakes were given the heave-ho? Well, it’s time for you to make like St. Patrick and clean house on those snakes. Here’s how…

Let’s say you identify clutter as one of your snakes. Take some time to reflect on it. How is it impacting your life? What would your life look like without it? Relax and breathe as you visualize a clutter-free life.

Next, ask yourself “Am I ready to let go of the clutter in my life?” You may be wondering why I’m suggesting that you pose this question. It seems like a no-brainer, who wouldn’t want to let go of something that’s bothering them? Well, it’s quite fascinating how people tend to hang onto things even when those things are causing them pain or discomfort. So what’s up with that? Often it’s caused by what I call the “comfortable discomfort.” In other words, the current conditions are so familiar that people maintain them even when those conditions are substandard. Many times it’s only when the dissatisfaction with the current situation becomes greater than the fear of change that people are able to let go. Only you will know when you’ve reached this point, so be honest with yourself.

Back to our example, say your answer is, “Yes, I am ready to let go of clutter.” You’ll then want to set the intention to let it go. Give the intention more power by saying it out loud to yourself, thinking about it often and writing it in your journal. And remember, when you want to let go of something or create a new habit, always come from a positive place. Example: “I now let go of the clutter in my life” instead of “I don’t want clutter in my life.” These are both simple sentences with 2 entirely different energies behind them. The 1st is positive and empowering and the 2nd is negative and counterproductive (as focusing on what we don’t want always is). Stay in tune with the words you choose and keep them positive. Also, recognize that your snakes didn’t get there overnight so it’s going to be a process to get rid of them. Focusing on the powerful vision of your snake-free life will pull you toward it.

To keep from feeling overwhelmed, break things down into “small bites.” For example, here’s how I “chunk it down” when it comes to my clutter “ankle biter”: I keep a kitchen timer handy and when I notice things piling up on my desk, I pull it out and set it for 15 minutes.** During that time I throw out or file as much as I can and when the timer rings, I’m done. Doing short bursts makes it much more manageable and I’m always surprised by how much of a dent I can make.

The timer trick can also help repel the procrastination “cobra.” Set your timer for 5 – 15 minutes and work on whatever you’ve been putting off. When the timer rings, simply move on to something else. Knowing there is “light at the end of the tunnel” makes it easier to get started. And sometimes you’ll find you get so engrossed you’ll want to keep at it even after the timer rings.

Now let’s talk about those “boa constrictors” (such as the relationships that are squeezing the life out of you). Most likely, if you are in a toxic or draining relationship, you know it. But say you’re in one and haven’t realized it yet? Take a look at your relationships; do they energize you or leave you feeling exhausted? Now ask yourself, “What do I need to do to make my relationships “clean and bright?” Does clean and bright mean everyone is happy, smiling and holding hands? Not at all; it means that you do whatever is necessary for you to be at peace with the relationship. So whether that means setting boundaries, having a conversation you’ve been avoiding, changing the way you choose to respond, apologizing, forgiving or even saying goodbye, it’s up to you to determine.

I’m visualizing lots of ankle biters, cobras and boa constrictors slithering away and that’s exciting! Thanks for the inspiration St. Patrick! And I’ll close with an Old Irish Blessing: “May the road rise up to meet you. May the wind always be at your back, May the sun shine warm upon your face, and rains fall soft upon your fields. And until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of His hand.”

Until next time, keep refining!

Love,
Melissa

Time to Refine Tips

1. Start by identifying the “snakes” in your life. How are they impacting you?

2. What would your life look like without them? Relax and breathe as you visualize your snake-free life.

3. Ask yourself, “Am I ready to rid my life of __________ (your snake here)?” If so, set the intention to eliminate it. Saying it out loud to yourself, thinking about it often and writing it in your journal will help strengthen your resolve. Always keep the language and thoughts around your intentions positive.

4. “Chunk it down” to keep from feeling overwhelmed.

5. Celebrate! Recognizing your snakes is the 1st step toward driving them out of your life.


** I 1st learned about using a timer for de-cluttering from Fly Lady. Her website (www.flylady.net) has many tips for getting organized. Since then I’ve applied the timer to many other areas with great success!

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